Monday, 15 September 2014

Running to the sea

The seasons changing only means one thing, me getting sick. I've spent my days sneezing until I thought I was going to burst, with a little bit of fever, a runny nose, and head thick as an elephant.
Also stress and that little anxiety that never fails to creep up my back, have also visited me. It's hard to put my priorities straight when I have so much free time.
On top of that my wisdom tooth started growing, it hurts a lot and even smiling is impossible. Marcus suggested I get an appointment with the dentist and I almost had a mental breakdown when I realised I had to do that myself. I'm not ready to be a grown up just yet. 

My mum had to cover an event happening a bit outside of Oslo so she went away for the weekend. I had to babysit my 11 year old sister, which turned out to be an uplifter and very nice. 

On sunday the day was absolutely beautiful so we took the train, and then a bus and ended up at this little paradise. 

Named,  Bogstad Gård it's basically a farm, a cafe, a museum, a lake, a forest, all that you need basically. It was full of families taking a sunday walk and kids running around, it was the perfect place to kind of clear my mind. 

I also fell in love with these fluffy creatures. I never knew sheep could be so nice, and soft and just adorable. I now really would love to have a sheep
I mean look at these faces!

Outfit wise, the goal was warm, comfy, but kind of put together. I think my black/grey ankle booties never fail to tie everything up as they are so simple, and structured. Grey highwaisted jeans from Weekday, and just a dark green cable knit sweater from Weekday also. And my lovely PiP tote bag from the festival. I really love the colour scheme, so autumn-y and crisp

We had some food and then walked along the lake for a while until we found this wooden dock I guess you can call it. We sat there because we still had about 45 minutes to kill until our bus came. 

I was still sort of dizzy and weak and the sun just made my head boil. I was laying on the dock and just listening at the children running on the path and the dogs and the bicycles and just life. 
It can be weird. I've never felt a stranger in Norway, although I'm definitely not from this place, it just never left me out of anything, never treated me in a bad way. It has definitely become home. 
But at the same time, without me completely understanding why and how it has changed me so much, and made me want to be so much more.
It's like whatever I do, it's not enough, and however fast I run I can never catch up. But at the same time I don't even know or understand what I'm trying to reach. 
I can say that I have everything, a family that loves and appreciates me, a home (three actually!), amazing friends, I live in this beautiful country, I've graduated successfully, I'm healthy, I do things I like and I have an wonderful boyfriend who loves me and makes me happy every single day. Yet I still feel so empty inside. I guess that makes me selfish and spoilt, I don't know. My thoughts keep extending and I swear I've created galaxies, and constellations in my mind and it's endless, I can't figure anything out.

Enough thinking for today I guess

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